Thursday, May 22, 2008

sydney to new york

Well i had a good last few days here (though really i wanted to be elsewhere -to get to see more- to extend and expand my visit) the problem is in five weeks in europe i felt satisfied that if i never got back to any one of those countries id live - i was sated. Here its too far away and too big and spread out and i didnt plan as well as i could (but you never know that until its too late so i guess i did plan as well as i could) and i feel that i have to come back to finish. I wanted to finish in one trip. I have other places to see. but i still am not done here. damn.

In anycas i had a great return flight to sydney with shanaz and her Mum picked us up at the airport and they were kind enough to let me hang with them for the day as we wandered around took the ferry to the quay popped into galleries at the rocks and had pastery at a lovely rude little french place that had the best chocolate caramel tarts so i went back every day. true i cannot resist caramel.
I had a great walk in the blue mountains I opted to skip the tour and just explore (i would have gotten around better on tour but i would not have been able to walk to all the things i saw it was great. i only saw 2 big ol spiders (i refused to look closely when i saw web in other places since i knew i had to walk through (the first spider was giant - meaning very long legged and yellow with a brown spot and the second was copper and brown really really shiny irridescent copper he made me jump over him but i didnt scream i wanted to take a pic of him but im not really that fond of them.
i had a big souvenir collecting day - i hate that part actually its hard to choose do i get the keychains or the magnets - no one really cares about keychains and magnets but they do care if you dont bring anything back! so i got tim tams everyone loves tim tams and they are authentic australian (my australian friends say so) and some assorted crap that hopefully will be put on a fridge somewhere
i finished off my groceries today (Do not mock me! yes i went grocery shopping , it seems unlikely since i havent stepped foot in the food emporium in ages but here the hostels have fabulous kitchens so i got some cereal and coffee and other bits and i ate in alot. i ate out a bit too. but i was trying to balance out the cost of the panadol advil nurofen stepasil ice packs ankle brace - did i mention the twisted ankle last week? or the cold passed to me in melbourne or the migrane (perhaps from the sun? or ear infection - suggested by someone else - or just a migrane with unfortunate timing? yeah im ignoring all of it. doctors are for NY -ice packs and things are just the same here, but i will say drugs cost alot more and the pharmacist is fabulous
" with this advil youll need to make sure youve eaten somthing before you take it also do not exceed six pills in a day thats a 24 hour period they are strong so be careful" WOW! its advil i take six at a time! she has the directions memorized, my pharmacist doesnt tell you what morphine could do to you let alone ibuprofen!
Anyway I ampacked and ready to go I have fun things to say but is 7 am and they floated right out of my brain as i sat down so too bad. Allthough while i remember i want to note waiters get paid 18$ an hour - try to get your check! they dont care you can stay all day they still get paid no one is rushing you out the door its amazing!
allright off to catch a plane, its about 530pm back home and im still trying to work out the math of when should i actually sleep on the flight that will make me the least lagged when i get there - i hate math.

Monday, May 19, 2008

melbourne

I decided i dont like blogging i prefer writing an email it seems more succinct or maybe its because i had no one to speak english with in europe so i was desperate to talk and it all flowed nicely. Im feeling- though i havent read a word- a bit disjointed like 'wait did i mention that?' hmm then the dilemna do i risk repeating myself or not. its too much thinking thank god im almost home!

Melbourne is a pretty city but i still feel i only need three days to get the cityafter 3 i get it, the layout the feel the sights, I live in one its not that hard. if you dont live there, there is only so much to see and take in I want to go to a natural setting but i was not in melbourne to see sights i was visiting. another odd transition, going from travelling alone on your own agenda no one to say i dont want to, no compromises. to being a guest in someone elses house and on someone elses schedule its just a weird transition. I had a great time Ryan and I split the couch cusions and took up spots on the floor for a few nights. trent had the weekend off and his friend Paul from sydney who now lives in Uluru ( sp? - ayers rock) also stayed the weekend and our friend shanaz from adelaide who lives in NY but is visiting her Mum in Wooloongong (follow that!) we had dinner and drinks with her friends on friday and sat was birthday celebration which began of course with a drag show "Jack and jill" (Jacqueline and jillettee) They were fun silly cheesy and believe it or not it was mostly women(this is odd for me to see) as they were having a hen party (bachelorette - you have to love the language differences) I was told by paul we would be getting 'dead set maggotted' and that i was being a 'slaggy mole' (whatever!) he couldnt quite give me a good explanation for slaggy mole but i determined it was like an angry slutty jersey girl in a mall and although enjoying my interpretation, shanaz gave us ferrel, uhm i believe thats what i said. dead set maggotted was just sloshed thats the -someone else would have to put you in a cab mode. I put us in a cab! and it wouldnt take us all the way because it had a prior engagement and there was construction and taxis in melbourne cost 10 cents every ten seconds. public transport is the tram - not good not bad but difficult you need instructions and the people who give instructions are likely to contradict each other so its better to walk if you can. I didnt learn anything new except that birthdays in foreign countries are expensive. and I need another month because frankly im still a little mad i coulndt find a way back to the gold coast the sunshine coast uluru (esp now that i know someone!) and a bunch of other places. I considered hiding out at a strawberryfarm to work for keep and pretend i missed my plane when i lost track of time but I dont think the farms pay they just let you work so you can stay there. weird. but dont think i wouldnt have done it if my show closed tommorow! Apparently i have to come back and i think thats the irritating part, it sort of kills the idea that i could take in everything in one trip just in case i never made it back (I have a lot of other things to see!)
here is the other thing i did learn - ok i knew there were large bugs and spiders and snakes and all that and honestly i wanted to go to uluru very badly however it is possible Paul has made that impossible with his outback stories the first one which i will share now (and please remember that he works for a very fancy resort) he had a centipede this big (when i say this big imagine a good foot between his outstretched hands) it freaked him out so he chopped it in half with a kitchen knife and it screamed and then it ran off in two seperate directions!!! TWO DIRECTIONS! TWO! also he said you have to watch em cause they can sting you from either end and they are cannibals so if you kill one you have to clean it up quickly and thouroughly or youll get a bunch more coming out for the feast. oh yeah im dyin to go there. that story is a dream killer. but the beach and the reef are still on and if i forget i may still be able to go (although a foot long centepede would be hard to forget I keep looking at the shower drain at my hostel!)
tommorow im off to the blue mountain tourist trap (the city rail guy was happy id made it to byron apparently its the only good choice i made cause i got to see something that wasnt a city cause he thinks every western city is the same (i kind of agree) he wished i was going somewhere more interesting but with my time constraints he understood and conceded to help me by giving me train times reluctantly.
I hope i will be able to get around and see more than the average tourist so as not to dissapoint!
see you soon!

Friday, May 16, 2008

Byron Bay

Ok i dont remember where i left off and frankly Im starving in an internet cafe in melbourne i arrived yesterday and met up with Ryan and Trent. Ryan and i were up at seven and have been walking around since then.
I ditched brisbane and jumped on the express bus to Byron bay (somewhere alo9ng the gold coast which claims to be the most easterly part of australia and its damn gorgeous.
I was pissed i had to leave i wanted to stay. i want to leave melbourne a day early and fly back for the end of my vacation.
I got there and ended up in a room of L 's Laura, Lydia, Lana and myself. we ended up hanging out taking in the beach togehter so we could watch each others things met for dinner and drinks and dancing later and then in the morning lana and I went sea kayaking It was amazing. i could spend days kayaking on the ocean ok i could spend everyday doing that it was beautiful and the dolphins swimming around and jumping up to twenty feet away was just a bonus.
I was so supposed to have a surfing lesson the next morning before i left but they changed it to the afternoon and i couldnt make it due to my bus, i seriously considered staying an extra night and risking missing my flight to melbourne thats how much i liked it but i didnt. and then my flight was late and i was pissed!
Melboune is a lovely city its definitely fall here leaves brown and hitting the ground crunching beneath your feet as you walk the wind it gusting and the sun is hididng behind fluffy clouds its 19 here and the weather report usually goes one of two ways- today 19 and fine or fine but a bit of rain. apparently fine is the only way to describe the weather if its not rainy everything else is fine. and i have no idea what 19 is but 19 is way colder then 23. I have no comprehension of celcius or metric its kinda killin me. Coffee here like everywhere else is not brewed is tiny and should be ordered as flat white or long black (I have no idea what it all means but somehow i keep getting coffee so its all good)
tonight will be dinner and drinks tommorow is a drag show with dinner and the big bday bash - i guess that means I will have to stay up pat eleven which i have only done once so far - time to nap!
i have more or i could make it more interesting but i just dont have another moment right now! gotta run ttyl!

Sunday, May 11, 2008

brisbane sucks

Honestly that is not what i wanted to title this post because it doesnt suck not really.
Everyone I have met here has been friendly funny outgoing kind entertaining, the people here are awesome even or maybe especially the two starbucks chicks one is going to marry a south american but not australian. they hate americans. it is a conversation i have heard numerous times in numerous countries i always happen to walk in on the i hate americans conversation. I feel obligated to then tell them as we are all laughing (for different reasons of course) that im american but these two realize it before i say anything and they have the usual yeah but you know what i mean thing. anyway htis conversation turns twenty entertaining minutes long and i enjoy them.
Its the highlight of my stay here.

The other highlight is roaches YES I SAID ROACHES DAMMIT DAMMIT DAMMIT!!!!!!
I am considering burning my luggage before i return
I WILLNOT HAVE THEM IN MY LUGGAGE!!

yes thank you all ladies and gentleman i found my first truly awful nasty dingy rotten scary fucking hostel.

they are of course the nicest people on the planet, however i get here sat afternoon fourish i have made my way to the place and now my room its tiny. i can live. its dark and the floors are wood unusual but i can live. there is no locker for my stuff. i will use the ones downstairs. there is a roach on the floor.
I cry. Instantly. actually i just let out a wheezing i canlive with that its just a bug right its dead who knows. Well i know im lyin to myself.
i have run to the desk and asked for assistance and the perky lady goes up to my room explaining brisbane is worse than NY cause its warm and she picks the sucker up with her hands like shes rescuing it pronounces it alive not dead and tosses it out a window like a spider out the door. W.T.F!!!
I decide im overreacting as i am wont to do when it comes to creatures of more than 6 legs.
i start to wander to get my bearings but all i can think is I HATE BRISBANE! but i know its the hostel not the city but i cant help but blame the city after all my hostess blamed the city why shouldnt I?
eventually i cool off but not calm down i go back to my room and as the lights come on oh yes my friends there was some mighty fine scurrying going on! i shook out all my shit and ran with it to the desk still holding back tears but barely and the lady offered me a different room. i said ok - to be honest it was late i had no idea where else to go but the second room was far and i mean far superior (that does not remove it from the category of roach infested dump it just means i only needed two beers to fall asleep on the top bunk along with all of my vacationly possesions).
I did not see any roaches and i was in a room with two german girls and three french none of whom had seen any bugs and one had been there a week.
Obviously they dont look for these things like i do.
I went downstairs and called Qantas i dont have to stay here! i can just fly on! and i think they would have let me but i felt i owed the city itself one more chance.
I knew my options were open so in the am after me and the three roaches had a really fast shower together i ran out the door and by 8 am had a new place to live - for one night and had booked myself a two day trip somewhere down the coast.

I also booked myself into the koala reserve today so the one thing i wanted to do here i did.
I squished a koala OH MY GOD
they are like thirty pound memory foam pillows they are awesome. they really do kinda stick to you like that toy where you pinch there back and they stay. they are like that. I wanted to squish him like my cat but they dont let you do that - they have claws and they bite. also they are alot like monkeys I feel like they should be in the monkey family not the bear family. they are bizarre.
Also I played with some kangaroos - they resemble camels up close. same eyes and nose but they are soft and cute and damn scary when they run at you full speed. but fun!

Im off to what i believe to be the beach for two nights (cause i couldnt stand another minute here)
i just dont see the point of being here so Im leaving.
Sorry Brisbane!

oh by the way BUNK is the name of the hostel to avoid! i plan to review it when i get back!

brisbane sucks

Friday, May 9, 2008

this post will not be funny. read at your own risk.

Ok so this is the boring phase where I catch you up to where i am and ramble on about how much ive done so far.
Its been a week since i left, no wait its been a day no four, DAMN I LOST TIME! and im dizzy, shut up i heard that.
First things first, airplane. (heres the really boring part so suffer along with me)
at the airport i frantically realized i needed a book. i had two with me but they were like broccoli and i needed pizza i was about to be trapped and the NY times crossword would only be a source of frustration without google to assist me.
I bought a spy novel i think.
I watched 27 dresses ate dinner watched ps i love you read 16 chapters of my book and then we landed in LA. for an hour. I paced very quickly hoping id wear myself out.
I reboarded read another 14 chapters ate dinner (yes again- the man serving it practically threatened us with you should eat now you its quite along way until breakfast.) so i did and i saved the brownie in case it was true. but then they brought a snack bag for the duration. then they finally turned out the lights but i had to wake the man next to me for fear if i didnt now id do it later anyway (the guilty dilemna of the window seat when to pee and how often)
I took a pill and i slept for an hour or eight im not sure and it didnt matter i still had five hours to go but i watched gone baby gone read another 12 chapeters of my spy book which i am saving for subsequent flights, ate breakfast at four in the morning their time which is now my time got to my hostel at 10 wandered about until 2 (no check in until noon)
by wandering about I mean I grabbed the free map and walked to the opera house and took in the view of the harbour and circular quay then i wandered through the botanical gardens and passed the government house (closed for a function) the parliment and museums through the park and the eye hospital (it was some strange shortcut i think i followed the inordinate amount of joggers down the path they were so numerous on thursday afternoon it was a bit freakish.- it turns out theres a marathon -
i returned to my hostel as i was very dizzy by this point showered and lay down a bit drank lots of water lay down for an hour then headed back out
I went to darling harbour and realized i hadnt eaten since four in the morning (that whole call it breakfast thing threw me) so i sat down and ate overlooking the harbour as the sun went down (at least i think it went down it turns out it doesnt actually get up there very high)
The sun here reminds me of iceland It never goes overhead at ten am its like 6 pm its very winter but its in the high 60s (ok i think its in the high 60s its like between 11 and 22 celcius so that does me no good) its warm if your in the sun its cool if your not
I came back and against all me better dizzy judgement as wired as i was i thought i should remain awake until 8 but that just wasnt happening.
I met my crazy indian bunk mate she had stuff strewn across my lower bunk and i asked her to move it (frankly i didnt want to squash her stuff and i planned to crash.
She isnt crazy actually she is older and apparently alone she has a whole lotta shit with her and talks loud on the phone and her stuff smells like tea tree oil.
my other roomies are Alex from south korea a clothing retailer and designer (studied for a year at fit) on vacation and shes meeting an internet friend for the first time on sunday.
there are two people i havent met and one girl who is estonian grew up in finland and is moving here for a year trying to be an au pair.

I had breakfast with alex this am she went to the blue mountains
I had no idea what i would do so it turns out i would buy a day pass on the transpotation system and feel obliged to use it as much as possible and honestly folks I am just on a quick break here, I leave tommorow for brisbane so today I took a nice long walk exploring a few hoods then just jumped on a train to a bus to the beach at Bondi did a five km sea walk then took the bus back to the train to a new neighborhood where i had lunch just in case) then i jumped on a fairy to manly beach and back I was about to walk over the bridge but i decided to take a quick break pack my suitcase and get warmer things as the sun has disappeared

ok im off hope it wasnt too much a bore if you made it this far -if not well next time.

Tuesday, May 6, 2008

set? and go!

its 1030 am. I am sort of packed. Well I was packed but it felt over packed so i unpacked then i got coffee from the deli. As i attempt to repack I slowly decide what to not bring. I think I brought less for five weeks and here i am struggling over two. Its the damn weather. I gave up the rain coat. screw that Ill dry off if it rains or stay in. I dont need a rain coat here why would i need one there. the other big dilemna as i roll my clothing up is what is the most comfortable plane wear. normally i wouldnt care a few hours later and your off. but i may be squashed between four or five people for 22 hours i need to be agile so i can steathily climb over sleeping snoring travellers. I cant fall asleep in socks so how can i possibly wear shoes should i have bought slippers?
this is what happenes when there is too much time to think before you have to go to the airport.
I have four more hours of hey maybe i shouldnt bring pants! no wait ill need those. socks who needs socks! hmmm maybe ill just buy shampoo when i get there and then i can reduce my vacation to a carry on! ooooh.
wait that may be going to far.
well I am off to buy snack food -because they may not have snack food in australia. or because i have to occupy myself in a productive manner for the next few hours.
In any case whatever ends up in my suitcase will be joining me on the subway at 3pm
woohoo im off! no really this time.

Friday, May 2, 2008

ready

allright here goes
Im ready 
I am ready to get out of this building to get on a plane and get the hell from here. 
but i have 3 more shows 2 more work days and one day off before im off and running.
Yes ladies and gentleman I am leaving the country. Again.
dont snicker at me that way! i cant help it I need to get away and I have some sort of wander lust that i must satisfy. 
wasnt five weeks enough you might ask, less than a year ago you might point out.
NO. well yes. but the opportunity came up to visit a friend in melbourne in may and celebrate his bday and so Im off. oh sure i could have used my money to pay of some outstanding bills. i could have caught up on my debt. i could have put it away for the future purchase of property - a valiant cause for cash saving. but no. I cannot allow that. its boring. and its all gonna be right where i left it upon my return. 
I am leaving on teusday for sydney i have two nights there before i run up to brisbane to squeeze a koala ( I hear thats the place to squish bears) then off to melbourne for a little birthday soiree.  then back to sydney for some research and relaxation (Im throwing that in as proof of my need to have a tax deductible working vacation - I will be researching a writing project and if i finish it i feel i can deduct this adventure next year - or i completely misunderstand taxes in which case it doesnt really matter anyway Im still going.
i come back on the 23rd and im back to work on the 24th -that may be the true adventure of the entire trip.

so Im ready by monday i will be set, Im sure ill add a bit more then. on tuesday i go.
I have started this now because apparently last summer my travelogue went over well with some folks and frankly i regret not posting the five weeks worth of insanity i experienced.  so at the moment we shall begin before i take off.